Happy birthday to verbicide
! In honor of this occasion, I'm posting with some news!
Brian and I are expecting a baby in January. (On or around the 22nd, but because I've read that due dates are only correct 5% of the time, the exact date does not seem all that important.) Obviously, this isn't terribly NEW news given that I'm almost seven months along, but I put off announcing it here for a while for various reasons, and then I kept putting it off.
One thing I've learned through this process is that my coworkers, 98% of whom are male engineers, have no filter between their brains and their mouths. It's like they've spent their whole lives filing away every piece of information that they see, and when an opportunity comes along to provide that information to someone in a relevant situation, they CANNOT RESIST.
So I've been keeping a mental list of things that male coworkers have said to me that I probably wouldn't say to my coworkers if I were in their place. I feel the need to mention that none of these people are my good friends - we don't have each other's cell phone numbers, I haven't been to their houses, etc - I think my close friends of either gender have a little more leeway to say this kind of thing to me.
1. When I told two different guys that I was pregnant (I'm almost positive that neither was aware of the other's reaction) before I was really showing but when I was maybe just slightly chubby, they each told me they had been wondering. When I referred to my stomach getting a little larger (I think I made a joke about eating too many donuts), they both clearly indicated that they meant my chest was getting larger. With hand motions.
2. When I told a third guy that I was pregnant a couple of weeks later, he also said he'd been wondering - because he was walking behind my at one point and noticed I didn't shake my hips when I walked like I used to.
3. I've been told that I need to find a childcare provider that has the same values as me. That guy then went on to tell me his Christian religion and say that he hired a family of a slightly different Christian religion to watch his kids, but said that they "still valued religion and family," as if it was somewhat surprising that someone outside of his religion would value family. He also mentioned that he wouldn't want crazy liberals undoing all the hard work he does in teaching his kids to hold Conservative viewpoints. (I care about politics, but my positions aren't a result of not having heard the arguments about the other side - I think each major party has some valid points, and I vote the way I do because I think about the pros and cons on each issue or candidate and then come to a conclusion.)
4. One guy told me that I should get a female OB/GYN, because if I had to have a C-section, she could make the incision below my panty line. First, I think male doctors know where a panty line is, and second, please stop talking about my panties at work.
5. One guy has told me a variety of different things about breast feeding that, although they might be helpful, are not necessary for my male coworkers to tell me and generally involve the words "breast" or "nipple," which I don't find to be extremely appropriate topics for the workplace. Especially when they're mine. This stuff falls into the category of things that would be appropriate for my close friends to tell me - but that I could probably get from books even if I happened to not have half a dozen close friends who had babies in the last year.
I think that's all of the really good ones I have, but there's still time!